Beauty in Brokenness

There’s something unique and beautiful that’s formed out of brokeness
from the struggles of this life. There’s always a redemption story to be told. There’s always a rescuer, and there’s always a Savior His name is Jesus! Through these last couple of weeks, God has been using my brokenness to breathe new life and revival to the dead parts of my heart where I can hear his voice in a new and beautiful way. I wanted to share a story of God’s grace, peace, and love meeting me in a wild way in the midst of my sin and brokenness, drawing me to repentance and into His unforgettable presence. Our time in Kruje, Albania, in debrief has been restful but tempting to fall in a place of complacency and comfortability. The temptations of this world/flesh would whisper enticing things in my ear, distracting me from my focus on God; through all of this was, dealing with a death in the family back home that had me recounting all the other deaths that had happened in my family in the last year. I wanted to leave the God I love and comfort myself with the world, but God is always faithful in meeting us in our brokenness. He knows that we are but dust and absolutely nothing without Him. There are two choices that we have when facing temptation. Run to God or from God; He is always ready to comfort us with His peace. I never want to forget just how unforgettable His presence is and always remember that from death comes new life that there’s beauty for ashes and joy for sorrow. To experience God, we must run to Him completely broken, which takes dying to ourselves and gripping life itself as our lives depend on it cause they do. To need a Savior, a father who helps His child who struggles to walk who needs to hold His hand as He gains strength to continue. As I sat on the side of the mountain on our sabbath, watching the village of Kruje overshadowed by this giant mountain in front of me, I began to pray and pour my heart out to God. About my sin and how my heart was hurting for this world. Interceding for everything, family at home, squads currently on the race, Ukraine, etc. I had my earbuds in listening to music as I was praying, then this song called Ariana by Tony Anderson, a Christian instrumentalist, came on. I began to weep, then weep some more as the peace of God washed over me. The Lord spoke to me while listening and told me to send the song and encourage one of the leaders on another squad who I’ve only talked to and met for the first time at training camp. Her name is Arianna, and I’ve never met or known any other Arianna except her in my life. I just knew God was pushing me to write a word of encouragement and send the song. So I did; mind you, when I sent it, she was still sleeping cause of the different time zones that matter cause of how this story plays out in the end. Once I got done writing and pouring my heart out on the side of the mountain, I came down and reunited with some of my squad. I was comforted by some of my leaders through the covering of prayer over me. So thankful for God’s love; it never fails. He knows how to meet us in our weaknesses. As I went about my sabbath, I continued to struggle, but God’s peace continued to comfort me, His amazing grace leading me to His heart. Later that evening, I checked my phone and saw I had received a text back from Ari. It was all in caps because of the excitement and joy it brought her that morning when she awoke; this is why. She said that I was in her dream that night. The dream was about other racers and me being in a mall, causing ruckus somewhere. And people were impersonating one another, and someone was impersonating me, pretending to be gently rebuking the team for not having fire/compassion to go after the lost who have never heard the name of Jesus. Ari was sitting towards the front and turned around to see how I reacted. I was laughing and enjoying that I was identified like that.
After reading that text, I was so blown away and overwhelmed by How God gave her that dream at the same time and directed me to encourage someone despite my brokenness. And God used that same person in return to encourage me in it, and it just came from simple obedience to the Holy Spirit. I’m so thankful for the way God speaks to me and uses the body/the Church to do it! It encourages me to continue to trust in His love for me. His ways are perfect and right! What He’s started He will complete! Thank you, Jesus, for your Church filled with your Spirit your love to build up one other in love and encourage one another not to give up but trust in Christ, who will empower us with His fiery love and compassion to share Christ with this lost world. To God be the Glory!